#Tegan – Brian D. Stout: Footprints of a loving father

When your mother and I ran off to Gatlinburg, Tennessee to get married on April 28, 2010, Kyle had become a fine young man and Shyanne was already a dependant young lady. Our children (your older brother and sister) were grown, therefore we planned on riding out the rest of our lives together, as best friends, with nothing but each other and the freedom to do whatever. Often, we would reflect on what we would have done or not done if we had it to do again, the same way everyone wishes for throughout their life. (It’s human nature…you, too, will know the feeling) Almost never, are those chances really given, though.

…And so we never gave, even a thought, to starting a family again, with each other. The Lord, however, works in mysterious ways. One day your mom told me she had something to tell me. She was uncertain how I would feel because it had never even crossed our minds that we were able to create another life together. She and I were older than a lot of parents, for one, but also, I was very wild and untamed and she wasn’t sure if I was ready to be a daddy. SO she brought me onto the back porch and told me we were going to have a baby.

…At that very moment, the entire world stood still and I felt a tug at my heart that is indescribable. I was the happiest man ever. In the beat of my heart, I was a changed man.

When we found out we were having a baby girl, we were both so happy that we cried tears of joy. It was as if my heart just suddenly turned soft and pumped love and kindness gently through my veins for the first time in my life. I became somebody that I never thought possible. My world began with you.

You are the change that we ALL needed to feel whole, and I knew it from the beginning. We watched in awe as you grew from a panut to a fist to a baby in mommy’s belly, and the doctor would let us see you on the tv screen every time. Always something new and exciting. One time I was listening to a song by DMX called: Lord give me sign on the way to meet your mommy at the doctor to see you. The lyrics repeat:” Lord give me a sign, show me what i got to do.” and when the doctor put your picture on the tv, you were holding your hands together like you were praying.

…And I have closed my eyes and thanked God every day since!

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Then came the day we got to see your beautiful face. So perfect! You made me believe in miracles.

Then, a month before the day the doctor said you would come, I kissed your mother and went in to work. She felt a little different, so she had kyle bring her in to the doctor just to see. There was something very different about the way that day felt. I had an overwhelming feeling, so I told my manager that I thought I was going to need to leave early because we were having a baby. “Ring! Ring!” Sure enough, it was your mom. “hurry.” she said. “meet me at the hospital, Tegan’s coming.” I threw the keys to my manager and jumped in my truck to meet her and your brother.

Once I got there they rushed me upstairs and put me in scrubs. “Where is my wife?” I asked one of the nurses. “She’s going in for surgery…you’re having a baby.” she replied. It had only been about an hour since she called me at work, but you were ready to come right now. I walked into the room, where i met your mother, and we both held each other’s hand, overwhelmed by an unbelievable and indescribable joy. Then, on September 13,2013 at 1303…